On Dealing With Pain.

Two stories for ya today on pain and how it is just an opportunity to improve things. :)

So last week after working out I set my running shoes under the bench in the locker room so I could grab a quick shower.  Of course, I have the memory of a goldfish and seeing as how I'd decided to sneak those lil buggers all the way under the bench, turns out I'd hid them so well even I forgot they were there!  Upon realizing this later the next day when I went to go grab them, I called the gym and, of course, they were nowhere to be found. :(  I was sooo angry!!

But, being angry wouldn't bring back my beautiful running shoes, all i could do was start where I was at and use it as a chance for improvement.  So began the search for a new pair of running shoes, which led me to these beautiful babies :)  

I've been wanting a pair of bright colored kicks for a bit now, and having my shoes stolen actually turned out to be a good thing because without it, I wouldn't have gotten this pair.  

Long story short- I love these shoes!  Why?

1- They are cherry red and that makes me happy

2- They make my gym outfits feel way more stylish

3- They make me want to go to the gym more bc I want to show them off :)

4- Believe it or not (this might sound super weird... haha) but they give me confidence because they are so loud and demand attention.  

And obviously, if you've got attention on you, you've got to be confident in it or ya look like a fool :)

So yay for my Red Runners :)

OK, second story on pain.  

And this one's a little bit more serious.  So I've grown up in a culture which seems to put a lot of pressure on marriage and the importance of being a wife and mother.  I believe in that, and I believe it's my destiny, but at the same time it's been a real tough time for me over the past year or so to see so many friends take the leap and just sit back on the sidelines and watch.  

I think there's a natural drive in us to want to be with another person and build that kind of amazing, strong and solid relationship that is special just for the two of you.  I want that, and I know that the Lord has something for me, but it's been a tough time waiting for it.  

I got a call yesterday from a really old family friend who's almost like a second mother to me.  She's so sweet and in following the promptings in her heart she called me out of the blue and we talked for a while, with the conversation eventually going to my dating life.  

And in Boston, it's been invisible.  

I talked to her about how I've felt this strong drive to want to start my own family, but ya know, it's kinda hard to do that on your own (shy of being Angelina Jolie...).  I'm not normally one to rely on others, so for me, having a goal which requires another person in order to achieve it has made it somewhat of a point of frustration for me.  I'm a very Type A person who likes to just see what needs to be done and do it.  That's not so easily done when you're To Do list looks like this:

1. Find a great guy who can be loyal to God and me above all else.

2. Make said guy's heart go pitty-pat.

3. Marry great guy and live happily till diapers come. ;)  

I've realized a bit though lately that instead of focusing on him I should just be focusing on me and becoming the right person myself.  

Then Rosemary told me that sometimes, it's like this:

You tell God, 'Lord, I'm wanting something for dinner.  I've thought about McDonalds and Burger King and Wendy's, and I just can't find what I'm looking for.'  But the Lord says, 'My sweet child, I've got a gourmet restaurant right around the corner for you.'

Sounds cheesy, I know, but I actually broke down in tears because I know that it's true.  Sometimes in life we just have to go through the rough times in order to become more refined so we can do the things we need to do later in life which require us to be better.  So here is my chance to be better.  Improve my relationship with the Lord, work on my own follies and foibles, and keep the faith that the Lord knows what He's doing.  

So in the end, the second story isn't near finished yet, but I know that with the right attitude and looking at it from the right perspective things will get better.  Ya know, growth = pain, and sometimes ya just gotta stick with it and know that pain is only temporary but totally worth going through.  :)